In which Our Hero demonstrates the void is optional.
Today I managed to manufacture—or maybe discover—some pleasure.
After a generally empty day (and I hate empty days), I was riding in the car feeling mildly dissatisfied when it hit me: I could change this. And the moment I realized that, I actually did. Suddenly I wasn’t dissatisfied anymore. I wasn’t stuck in that void of nothingness. I felt…pleasure. And that was nice.
Clown school is teaching some real skills! 😀
I was driving with a friend who kept trying to play with me. I rejected the first three or so times. Playing with other people is still hard, especially when I’m dissatisfied. It’s so much easier to play alone.
Which is unfortunate, considering I can’t play games alone until at least January 7th.
(I made a self-binding bet before I broke my foot. And now…well, here we are.)
So therefore:
Time for me to find new occupations for my ample free time whilst my foot heals.
(Or should I say “heels”?)
It’s nice that bored dissatisfaction isn’t mandatory, even if you’re bored.
It’s nice the game is still in me.
Perhaps some day I will learn to share it with others.
For today, at least this is nice.
Julian Wise 