In which Our Hero <schlorp schlorp schlorp>.
On our long third date, my partner and I got stuck in the mud.
We were rock hounding after snowmelt, down a dirt road off another dirt road in the middle of nowhere without cell service, and my two-wheel-drive van got stuck.
I was driving; clearly my fault.
We discussed our options: 1) get unstuck; 2) sleep here and walk the 5-7 miles to town in the morning to get cell service to call for a tow.
2 hours later, after around 10 overly optimistic “that’s it! We’ve got it!”s, both the van and I were covered with mud, and our gentle rocking (putting some rocks just behind the wheels and move back; putting rocks in front of the front wheels and move forward; repeat without rinsing) had us back on solid ground.
—
Yesterday, I made a mistake.
A reasonable mistake.
A mistake that…
Because, like, how can a refrigerator exist that doesn’t fit through a normal width doorway?
A fair question.
But it turns out my doorway is 1.5” short of normal width.
Oof.
—
At 9am someone posted “free fridge!” In the neighborhood free group.
Within 40min, I had dibs.
At 11am, my super lent me his hand cart.
At 5:45pm, my partner and I walked the 5 short blocks and one long block to pick it up. This walk took 20 minutes, 5 of which was spent buying a ratchet strap for a 15% discount because it lacked a component that wouldn’t affect our use.
At 7pm, we reached home with the fridge.
… and realized it was too wide for the building’s front door.
So I took the fridge doors off while my partner measured our unit door.
She reported back, “We’re going to need to take the unit door off too, but it should fit”.
At 7:45pm, I had the fridge doors off and it at the front door to our unit.
At 8:15pm, we had the unit door off, despite 3 screws being stripped before we got there, and concluded the fridge bulges slightly in the middle
At 8:40, we had just enough screws back in the unit door to close it (if you physically heave up on the knob to seat it properly in the latch), stowed the fridge in the basement, and went for pizza.
—
What did I learn?
- Excitement and optimism can distract from considering practicalities.
- Doors may be a standard 30” wide. But some doors are not standard. I imagine the same applies to other common items (eg cars).
- Avoiding the sadness and pain during the installation and re-installation will increase the likelihood this sort of event happens again.
The whole experience was frustrating and grumble-provoking.
Many parts of me were generally annoyed at the situation. And therefore annoyed at all its contents (me, my partner, the door).
It’s interesting, however, that this didn’t cause my partner any emotional harm. (I asked.)
Evidently she also felt frustration and dissatisfaction, but the annoyance I felt at her didn’t come through to her.
Since getting engaged, this appears to be a change. Maybe the fact of having an increasingly-solid foundation means we’re both less worried about some of the minor pokes and scuffles.
She knows that it’s us against the problem. And the problem is challenging and frustrating and annoying. So even though I’m partially annoyed at her (because I’m annoyed at everything), it’s chill.
And that’s nice.
Because sometimes we get stuck in the mud.
And when we do.
90% of the time it’s my fault.
😂
Julian Wise 