The day I decided to trust myself.

On following others:

School is following others. Culture instills following others. Corporations, countries, and organizations require following others. Following others is not for the individual. It’s for the safety of the herd.

On freedom and the individual:

I need the freedom to express. I need the freedom to explore. I need the freedom to create. These are only taught by the world’s best teachers. Learn to learn from yourself or risk living someone else’s version of your life.

Just because it never happened doesn’t mean it isn’t true

We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when my faithful Roadtrip Companion challenged me. “Compose the opening paragraph,” he said to me, “of completely fictional history book chapter.” I did. Here’s what never happened:

Released from bondage, but no longer welcome in the land they once ruled, the exiled Klimbaugh people went west, toward present-day Kyrgyzstan and Tajikistan.

Their search for religious acceptance would frequently be met by hostility toward their unusual practices, most famously in the Great Hangings of Dushanbe. The Klimbaugh’s movements can be traced until 1400 BCE, after which most scholars agree that the pressures of their hostile surroundings, un-arable land, and lack of social acceptance drove the final vestiges of this once-great kingdom to assimilation or death.

“People say to me, “thank you for your service.” I say, “You ruined my country.”

“People say to me, “thank you for your service.” I say, “You ruined my country.”


Talk to the man in the reflective vest in line behind you at Whole Foods.

A non-fiction monologue. Not verbatim, but accurate.

I been a marine for 27 years. I went away to war and the country was Leave it to Beaver. I come back and the country’s run by bullies. It’s the fat girls who became HR directors.

People say to me, “Thank you for your service.” I say, “You ruined my country.”

Twenty-seven years ago, war starts and all the strong men go away. Who stays back? Weak men. Now, the strong men come back and they’re messed up in the head. Who’s in charge? The fat girls who were bullies in high school. These are the people who speed up to get in front of you on the sidewalk just so they can slow down. Me? I’m married to a 32-year old Indonesian woman. Muslim, never been with a man.

I said that to my HR director. I said to her, “It’s the fat girl mentality running this company. That’s why our turnover’s so high.” Since I said that, our turnover rate plummets.

I say to my boss, “I don’t care if it’s PC or not. I say what I think” and he gets that.

I been a marine for 27 years. I been burned, cut up. I say things, people get mad. People say they’re not politically correct. I say, “Maybe not for your country now, but my country’s older than yours and there’s still some of us left.”